Ask and You Shall Receive: Negotiating for Your Needs as a Nurse
Joan is the kind of nurse every manager dreams about—reliable, competent, never complains. The kind of nurse who remembers birthdays, shows up early, stays late, and knows every single patient’s nickname.
You’d think someone like Joan would be promoted in a heartbeat. Or at least paid what she’s worth.
She said:
“I’ve never asked for anything. Not a raise, not a schedule change, not even a day off without switching with someone else first.”
Not because she didn’t need anything.
But because somewhere along the line, she learned that good nurses don’t ask. They adjust. They endure. They make it work.
Sound familiar?
Why So Many Nurses Don’t Ask for What They Need
If you’re a Filipino immigrant nurse—or from any culture that values humility, service, and keeping the peace—you probably grew up believing that asking for more is a form of selfishness.
You don’t want to be labeled mayabang (boastful).
You don’t want to seem demanding.
You don’t want to be ungrateful.
And the healthcare system? It doesn’t exactly make it easy to speak up. Staffing shortages, burnt-out managers, a “just be lucky you have a job” culture... all of it trains us to settle.
But here’s the truth:
Advocating for yourself is not selfish. It’s strategic.
And when you do it well, everybody benefits.
What Happens When You Finally Ask
Joan finally asked.
After months of coaching and role-playing conversations, she asked for a raise, presented the metrics of her performance, and requested a more sustainable weekend rotation.
You want to know what happened?
She got the raise.
She got the new schedule.
And—brace yourself—her manager thanked her for being clear about what she needed.
Turns out, people can’t give you what you need if you never tell them.
Wild, right?
4 Steps to Negotiating Like the Smart, Strong Nurse You Are
1. Know Your Value (and Bring Receipts)
Don’t just say, “I deserve more.”
Say: “In the past 6 months, I’ve trained 3 new nurses, maintained consistent charting accuracy, and picked up 8 extra shifts. I’d like to discuss a raise that reflects this.”
2. Practice Saying It Out Loud
Negotiation isn’t just about what you ask—it’s how you say it. Practice in the mirror, with a coach, or a friend. Get the words in your mouth before you’re in the room.
3. Ask Without Apologizing
You are not a burden. You are not asking for a favor.
You are initiating a professional conversation.
No more: “Sorry, I just wanted to ask…”
Try: “I’d like to talk about how we can make this role more sustainable and reflective of my contributions.”
4. Expect a Yes (But Be Prepared for a No)
Sometimes the answer is no. That’s okay. The goal isn’t just a raise or a new schedule. The goal is to be seen, heard, and respected. And that process begins the moment you ask.
You Deserve More Than Survival
You were not called into this profession just to survive 12-hour shifts, skip your breaks, and say yes to everything while your own needs get pushed to the back of the locker.
You were called to care—and that includes caring for yourself.
So here’s your reminder:
💬 You’re allowed to ask for rest.
💬 You’re allowed to ask for recognition.
💬 You’re allowed to ask for what you need—and more.
Because when you ask, you open the door to something bigger than just a raise or a new schedule.
You start building a career where you belong.
Fully. Authentically. Powerfully.
And that?
That’s what leadership looks like.
Even in scrubs.
Especially in scrubs.
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