The Feminine Way: Building Without Breaking Yourself
Last week in one of my coaching groups, something happened that crystallized what I've been trying to name for months.
One of the coaches shared that she was stuck on her enrollment conversations. She didn't know what to say, or how to ask for the sale without feeling pushy. I could have stayed silent. Kept my script to myself. Protected my "edge." But instead, I typed out what I said and used for enrollment conversations. "Use this as a starting point," I wrote. "I'd rather we all succeed than keep this to myself."
That moment reminded me: the feminine way of doing business isn't about domination or outpacing each other. It's about coming together.
About community. About sharing ideas, resources, contacts, and wisdom without the quiet fear that there won't be enough to go around.
When coaches come together with generosity instead of scarcity, something shifts. We stop trying to win over each other. We start rising with each other.
And that, to me, is alignment.
Alignment Isn't Just Pretty Brand Colors
Here's what most nurse entrepreneurs get wrong about alignment.
They think it's about having the "right" offer or the perfect brand colors. They think it's about finally figuring out how to translate their clinical skills into business language. But alignment isn't a destination you arrive at after making all the correct strategic choices.
Alignment is building in a way that feels human.
Heart-led. Relational. Where your business doesn't ask you to harden or shrink parts of yourself just to be taken seriously. Where you don't have to choose between being a nurse and being an entrepreneur. Where you don't wake up exhausted from performing a version of success that doesn't actually fit you.
I learned this the hard way. Years ago, I tried to build my coaching practice the way I saw other business coaches doing it. Daily content that felt performative. A sales process that made my stomach turn every time I got on a call.
I made money. But I also made myself miserable.
Here's what I couldn't see then: I was trying to erase my nursing background and my upbringing instead of building from it. I thought I needed to sound more "business-y" to be taken seriously. I thought my empathy was a weakness, not the foundation of everything I do.
The turning point came when I realized I was trying to force my way into success instead of building from my actual values. My soul was asking for one thing, and I kept giving it strategy.
That's when everything changed.
The Magic and the Tactics (You Need Both)
I love the idea of tactical magic.
Not magic as in bypassing reality or hoping the universe will do all the work for you. But magic as in meaning. Soul. Humanity. The invisible forces that actually move people: trust, resonance, timing, intuition.
And tactical as in real tools. Real strategy. Real systems. Real tech.
The magic without the tactics becomes wishful thinking. You can journal about your ideal client all day, but if you don't know how to reach them, nothing happens. You can attend every coaching training, but if your offer isn't clear or your messaging is vague, people won't buy.
The tactics without the magic become soulless and exhausting. You can have the perfect funnel, but if it doesn't reflect who you actually are, you'll burn out maintaining it. You can post content daily between nursing shifts, but if it's not rooted in your real perspective, it'll feel hollow.
The sweet spot is holding both.
Being fully yourself and growing a coaching business. Honoring your nursing values and learning how to market. Listening to your intuition and building structures that support you.
This is what I mean when I say tactics fail without the right mindset, self-awareness, and aligned strategy. I've seen it over and over. Nurse coaches with all the tactics and none of the inner alignment still have clients who don't implement or succeed. Because the foundation is missing.
When you marry the magic with the tactics, you stop choosing between your heart and your business success. You build something that actually lasts.
The Question Every Nurse Entrepreneur Asks
"What's my niche?"
I hear this question at least three times a week from nurses building coaching or consulting businesses. And I understand why it feels urgent. If you knew your niche, you could move forward, right? You could finally start marketing. Finally create that offer. Finally feel certain.
But here's the version of that question I hear more often: "How do I niche down without losing my nursing identity?"
You're afraid that picking a specific focus means abandoning everything you've learned in your nursing career. You're worried about getting pigeonholed. You're stuck trying to figure out how to translate "I help people" into something that actually attracts clients.
Here's the uncomfortable truth I've learned and relearned: You cannot think your way into clarity.
You can't whiteboard your way to the "right" niche. You can't journal your way into certainty. You can't wait until it feels obvious before you move.
Clarity doesn't come from thinking. It comes from action.
From trying things. From choosing what feels right enough and moving forward. From realizing, sometimes painfully, that something isn't it, and then adjusting.
I once spent six months "researching" my niche. I read books. I took assessments. I made lists and vision boards. And you know what happened? Nothing. I stayed stuck in the same place, just with prettier notebooks and a growing fear that I wasn't "business-minded enough" to make this work.
It wasn't until I chose a direction and started coaching actual people that I learned what I actually loved doing. What lit me up. What felt aligned. I took action on the wrong thing more than once. That wasn't failure. That was how discernment got built.
You will take action on the wrong thing. More than once. That's not a sign you're broken or off track. That's the process.
Alignment isn't a lightning bolt moment where everything suddenly makes sense. It's a relationship. One you build by listening, acting, reflecting, and course-correcting, again and again.
What It Looks Like When You're Actually In It
So if you're feeling unsure right now, that doesn't mean you're off track.
It might mean you're actually in it. Learning. Becoming. Finding your way not by force, but by participation.
Here's what that looks like in practice for nurse entrepreneurs:
You try an offer and it doesn't sell. Instead of deciding you're terrible at business, you ask better questions. What didn't resonate? What feedback did I get? What would I do differently next time? You remember that your clinical assessment skills are also business skills.
You post content about your nursing experience and how it shapes your coaching, even though it's not perfectly polished. You learn that authenticity lands harder than perfection ever could. You discover that your nursing stories are what make you different, not what holds you back.
You reach out to another nurse coach for support, advice, or collaboration, even though it feels uncomfortable. You discover that generosity creates reciprocity, and that asking for help isn't weakness, it's wisdom. You remember that nursing taught you teamwork, not competition.
You build systems that support you instead of drain you. You choose tools and tech that make your life easier, not more complicated. You give yourself permission to build your business around your nursing schedule, not despite it.
You stop apologizing for bringing your nursing perspective into entrepreneurship. You realize your empathy, your systems thinking, your ability to stay calm in chaos are exactly what make you an exceptional coach or consultant.
This is the feminine way. Not soft or passive, but deeply intentional. Rooted in community, not competition. Built on trust, not hustle. Sustainable, not extractive.
The Invitation
Maybe that's the most authentic way for nurses to build businesses after all.
Not by forcing yourself to sound more "business-y." Not by performing some version of entrepreneur that doesn't feel like you. Not by shrinking your nursing identity to fit into someone else's definition of success.
But by building something that honors who you are. By holding the magic and the tactics together. By taking action even when you're not certain. By rising with the nurses around you instead of trying to outpace them.
That's alignment. That's the feminine way.
And if you're in the messy middle of figuring it out right now, exhausted from your shift and wondering if you'll ever land consistent clients, you're not behind. You're not "not business-minded enough." You're right where you need to be.
